The Crystal Hyena
by Unbidden-Angel
Summary: As punishment for touching a sacred artifact, the Joker is turned into an animal. What happens when Bruce Wayne adopts him? Will contain slash in later chapters. Hyena!Joker. T for now but will go up in later chapters.
1. The Crystal Hyena

**The Crystal Hyena**

Chapter 1: The Crystal Hyena (Otherwise known as The Joker's Transformation)

**Disclaimer:**

_Summery:_ _As punishment for touching a sacred and cursed artifact, the Joker is turned into an animal. What happens when Bruce Wayne adopts him?_

"Talking"

'Thinking'

_The Poem_

I, unfortunately, do not own the Batman.

* * *

"Joker! Get back here! You have nowhere to run to! The whole place is surrounded! Surrender now and we _might_ go easy on you!" Came the amplified voice of Commissioner Gordon.

In response, merely cackled madly and continued to run down the halls of Gotham Museum. He was half-way down a hall leading to a back-alley exit when something caught his eye. Backing up a few steps, the Joker stared wide-eyed at something in a glass case before dropping everything in his arms; luckily not breaking any of the priceless artifacts. Giving a short squeal-like sound, he claps his hands to the sides of his face and steps closer.

"Well, give me wings and call me Batsy!" he says before reaching for the large glass case. Lifting it, he tosses it to the side. His face falls and he looks confusedly at a small folded up piece of yellowed paper he hadn't noticed before. Picking it up, he pulls a pair of rectangular glasses from his pocket and reads aloud,

_"Beware all thieves,_

_with crystal eyes and ruby tongues,_

_for while gold you seek,_

_that was never yours,_

_laughing crystal curses,_

_those whose sleep,_

_it disturbs."_

Blinking, he rereads it before cackling madly once more and folding both back before placing them in a hidden pocket.

"Like some horrible poetry will keep me from stealing _this_! Hahaha! Priceless! Come to Papa!" He laughs, reaching out and wrapping his fingers around the glass creature. As soon as his flesh connected with the mysteriously warm crystal, its inset ruby eyes started glowing.

He managed a confused, "Huh?", before the silvery-blue light that had started to surround the Hyena shaped crystal began to creep up his arm, making his flesh, muscles, veins, and even bones, _**screech**_ in pain. After the light made it's way to his shoulder, he sharply drew in a breath and screamed with everything in him. Before long, the light had covered him completely and his world started to blur. When the light grew brighter, he screamed so loudly that half-way through his voice gave out and seconds later, thin trails of blood ran down his chin, dripping onto the floor.

His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he falls to the floor, unconscious, dragging the glowing crystal with him. The only things witnessing his bizarre and tortuously painful transformation, were the other items and glass casings in the hallway.

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I hope you like the first chapter. If anyone has any alterations for me, any helpful hints, just let me know. I know that the poem sucks, but it was the best I could think of. Its basically saying that if you touch it, you will be cursed. Please R&R? And if anyone is wondering, the version I'm using in this story is the one from Boomerang. Also known as Monkey!Joker.


	2. Bruce's New Pet Joker's POV

**The Crystal Hyena**

**Disclaimer: No own Batman.**

"Talk"

_'Think'_

_

* * *

_

**Chapter 2: Bruce's New Pet *Joker's POV***

It wasn't much later that I was awakened by a loud booming noise and a bunch of loud stomping noises. When I open my eyes, I realize that I can almost see clearly, even in the dark. I glance around, trying to figure out why I felt so different and where I was. Glancing over, I see a crystal shaped like a Hyena with rubies set in for eyes. I wince and whimper softly in remembered pain as the previous events rush back to me.

_'Maybe it has something to do with why I feel so strange.'_ I think before realizing that for the first time in a long time, I could think clearly. I roll over and stand up, noting the fact that everything was bigger than I was. Looking down, I realize that while I was still wearing my purple coat, I couldn't see my hands; I had a sneaking suspicion that they were paws now. I shake my head and run behind a tall rectangular stand, crouching, as the sounds of many boots hitting stone floor rushed steadily closer. I strained my ears, which were somehow much more sensitive, and held my breath as the sound of running stopped. I watched closely as long streams of light searched the room. After a moment, one pair of feet began to walk forward, swinging what appeared to be a flashlight attached to a gun.

"He's not here. He must've dropped the stuff and ran." Came a man's voice, loud and clear. The beam of light fell and he continued forward, going past me to check the door. I wait until the other lights have turned away before darting out the door, making the armed man holding it to jump and release a cry of surprise. Darting out of the alley, I run towards one of my hideouts, paying no attention to the shocked yells of the civilians or the sounds of the armed men chasing me.

I was almost there when my muscles began to ache from running so long. Glancing backwards, I notice that they were barely panting while I could hardly breath. Darting around the corner, I spot a car and dive under it, smiling as they run past. I wait until I have caught my breath before crawling out from under the car. Apparently, I should have waited a little longer because one guy with dark brown hair in a loose ponytail had decided to stay behind.

A loud cry of "Hey!" told me he had seen me. I turn my head and spot a partially open door. I rush towards it, hoping to loose the armed man somewhere inside. Slipping inside, I keep running blindly until I see a pair of shiny black shoes attached to a black pair of suit-pants. Quickly crouching, I leap into their arms and curl up, hoping they would keep me safe until the man who smelled-strangely enough- of peaches, stopped chasing me. I ignore the words being said and curl up even more, refusing to move until I heard the peach-man walk away.

I look up and snarl angrily. I had just leaped into the arms of a certain billionaire playboy who I greatly despised; Bruce Wayne.  
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Sorry it took so long to get this up. My computer kept messing up and deleted them. Then it'd freeze up so I couldn't post them. And yes the Joker is sane now. This is only because I was too lazy to try writing him insane. He will remain sane until such time comes where insanity is needed and can be written.


	3. Bruce's New Pet Bruce's POV

**The Crystal Hyena**

Ch.3: Bruce's new pet *Bruce's POV*

Disclaimer: Don't own Batman.

"Talk"

_'Think'_

* * *

I give a sigh when the conference ends, picking up my briefcase as I head for the door. _ 'This is the part where I go home, have dinner with Alfred, and follow up with patrol as the Batman.'_ I open the door and take no more than two steps before being forced to drop my briefcase and take a step back. I blink confusedly and look down, trying to understand why an animal wearing a grimy purple coat was laying curled up in my arms.

"Hey! Is this animal yours, Mr. Wayne?" Asked a young man with his long brown hair in a loose pony tail. I take notice of the fact that his green uniform looked mostly new, although appearing disheveled, and that he was panting a little. I look down when the creature in my arms curled up even more. _'It's afraid.'_ I realize.

"I'm so sorry officer." I say, fully aware of the stares and whispers behind me. "I just got him. I hope he hasn't caused too much trouble." I smile and inwardly smirk when he smiles back.

"Of course not. We just found him near a recent crime scene, is all. Were you aware that your pet was out wondering around?" He asked seriously, obviously trying to catch me in a lie. My smile widens. _'Not working, kid.'_ I think smugly.

"He is adventurous and smart, so he probably snuck out. He's still settling in. I'm really sorry for any trouble he's caused. I'll take him home, _right away._" I say, forcing a concerned ans apologetic look on my face.

"Oh! No trouble at all, Mr. Wayne. Have a good one! And, be careful about letting that ...dog out. Okay, Mr. Wayne?" He gives me a look, his last chance to catch me up in a lie. _'Still not working, kid.'_ I think right back. I almost felt sorry for him. Key word:_ Almost._

"Right away, officer. Goodbye and thank you." I respond, bending over to pick up my briefcase before walking out to my car. I try to ignore 'my pets' eyes on me and the low growling noise. By the time I get to my car, he's growling so loudly that civilians are stopping to stare. After opening my car's door, I toss my briefcase into the back and climb in. Shutting my door, I release him and chuckle as he jumps into the passenger seat, turning to glare hatefully at me.

"So. Sounds to me like you had a busy day. You got a home? And where did you get that purple coat anyway? Buy it off the Joker? C'mon, let's go home. You could use a bath anyway. You look like some kind of hobo-pet." I say, laughing when he glares harder, as I start the car and drive home.

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Sorry for it being so short. I just needed to have a few things added in that didn't go well when I tried to put it in with Joker's POV. I'm also really sorry for how long it took me to post this. Ch.4 will be right after this.


	4. Insert Crystal Causes

**The Crystal Hyena**

Ch. 4: Insert/ Crystal Causes

Disclaimer: No own Batman.

"Talk"

_'Think'_

_ *__Change of location*_

* * *

_*Back at the Museum*_

After seeing the small black 'dog', wearing what appeared to be a large purple coat, some of the armed men chased after it while others spread out, trying to see what was missing. A single man with short red hair was bent over, sorting out the pile of rare and expensive Museum artifacts that the Joker had dropped only moments before.

"Well, it seems like everything listed is here. He must have dropped them. But, why?" The red-haired man stated, releasing his radio. When his partner didn't answer, he turned from the pile at his feet and watched silently as the other studied the hall.

Running his eyes over the broken glass, that had moments before been a case, he studied each piece carefully before casting his eyes upon the Hyena-shaped crystal. He began to laugh loudly, startling his partner.

"What? You know something I don't? Davis.. are you alright?" The red-haired man asked, stepping back slightly and clutching his radio.

Davis, taking a few calming, deep breaths, explained,"This is the _Crystal Hyena._" Then at the blank stare he received," Sheesh, Morris. Get out every now and then. The Crystal Hyena is a cursed jewel. If you touch it, you turn into your soul-animal."

"Soul-what?" Morris dead-panned.

"A soul-animal. It's the animal your soul is the most like. Like, say, you eat nothing but salads and are generally rabbit-like. Your soul-animal is probably a rabbit. Your personality is a big tip-off as to what your soul-animal is. Get it?" Davis explained further before bursting out laughing again. Morris seemed to think about it for a moment before bursting out laughing as well.

"He's probably a monkey!" Morris cackled.

"Yeah! Or a Hyena!" Davis cackled back. They began to clean up the pile the Joker had dropped, unaware of how right they were.

* * *

I'm also sorry for how short this chapter is as well. It's not very important really. Just something to explain the Crystal better. The points will be better highlighted as the story continues. Yes-Joker DID regain his sanity by becoming a animal. Yes-there will be a way out. Yes- Bruce really will adopt him. Eventually. And no-Morris and Davis are not important. They will probably not show up ever again. Hope that clears up a few things.


	5. Rubber Ducky

**The Crystal Hyena**

**Disclaimer:** I, unfortunately, do not own the Batman.

_Summery:_ _As punishment for touching a sacred and cursed artifact, the Joker is turned into an animal. What happens when Bruce Wayne adopts him?_

"Talking"

_'Thinking'_

**Chapter 5: Rubber Ducky**

Alfred Pennyworth, long-time butler to the Wayne family, looked up from the dinner he was preparing when he heard the familiar sound of Bruce's car parking in the garage.

"Master Bruce, I do hope your hungry. You wouldn't want to fight with, say, the Joker and collapse from hunger would you?" The British man stated, turning just in time to see Bruce step into the kitchen with a small black dog-like creature wrapped in a purple coat cradled in his arm.

"What _is_ that, Master Bruce?" Alfred asked, blinking when it shifted.

"I think its a dog. It just jumped in my arms back at Wayne Enterprises. I think this is a sign that you were right Alfred. I really _do_ need another companion." Bruce chuckled.

"Right. I hope its healthy. I'd hate for us to get the plague or rabies." Alfons replied before turning back to the meal he was preparing. Bruce blinked and nodded before walking up the stairs to hs personal bathroom. On his way, he stopped and grabbed a couple of towels before continuing on to the bathroom. Once there, he set the 'dog' down on the sink before turning the bath water on and plugging the tub.

"I'll take your jacket to Alfred and he'll wash it, okay? Then maybe we can make you a new one that would fit better." Bruce raised his hands cautiously, keeping his guard up in case the animal decided it didn't want to be friends. When the animal seemed to nod, he lifted first one paw then the other, slowly helping it remove the purple jacket. When it was fully removed, he stepped back and observed the animal carefully before helping it to the floor and turning off the water.

"Can you get in there?" Bruce asked it, noticing that the creature seemed unsure. When it eventually placed its paws on the thick, low-laying marble rectangle surrounding the tub and nodded, he left the room.

While Bruce was out, Joker walked over to the full-body mirror. He studied the strange creature in the mirror before finally focusing on the fact that it _was_ himself he saw there. He carefully studied his new body, taking in the fact that he was covered in oil and grime. He focused his red eyes (_'At least _something_ stayed the same.' he thought_) on his muzzle, finally noticing the stray red hairs that dotted around it and formed a strange form of dog-smile. He began to hyperventilate as his mind finally began to process that he _was_ an animal now.

He only noticed that Bruce had returned when he was picked up.

"I don't know why your here. Or where you came from (the Joker had to visibly restrain himself from trying to bark out _'You see, when a Mommy and a Daddy get together....'_ /1/). But don't worry. I'll find out. Then you can go home." Bruce spoke in a hushed and gentle tone, lowering the 'dog' into the tub before grabbing his shampoo. "Hope you don't mind. I'll have to get you some dog-shampoo tomorrow."

The Joker merely nodded and stood still, thinking about what he'd do now that he was an animal. He was brought out of his thoughts when he felt a warm fluffy towel wrap around his body. He hadn't realized that Bruce had finished bathing him. He barely growled, even while he was being toweled-off.

"Master Bruce. Dinner is served. Oh. And your coats in the wash." They both turned to see Alfred standing in the doorway. They nodded and he left, barely making any noise while going down the stairs.

"Well, you ready to go? And face the wrath of Alfred Pennyworth?" The 'dog' merely glared at him, making him chuckle. If looks could kill.....

Bruce walked down the stairs and to the dining room. Dinner went by with nothing out of normal; Alfred occasionally glanced at the dark-furred animal and said animal tried his best to behave. If _Bruce Wayne_ was afraid, even a little, of his butler's wrath, Joker in animal form didn't stand a chance.

It was only when they were sitting around the fireplace- Alfred reading, Bruce thinking, and Joker dozing- that Bruce bent to lift the animal. Staring into its annoyed ruby eyes, Bruce gave it a contemplative once-over. Neither backed down until Bruce began to mutter under his breath. It took the Joker a moment to catch what was being said.

"-Bill, John, Daniel? No, no. Not right. Fluffy, Shadow, Ruby?" The Joker gave a twitch. Bruce was trying to rename him. With every new name, Joker would growl louder. No _way_ was he being called _Fluffy_, _Moofy_, or something stupid like that. His ear twitched when Alfred sighed.

"What about Jack, Master Bruce?" He asked, not even glancing up from his paper. Both considered the name for a second before Joker yipped. It was the best he was going to get. He could feel it....

"Well, Jack. Welcome to the family." Bruce smiled. Joker only blinked at him and jumped down.

Sorry it took me so long. I got lazy and when I DID type it up the first time, my computer wouldn't pull it up. The next chapter will take longer. It hasn't even been written yet, nor am I able to come up with anything.

/1/- This is a little joke b/t my friends and me.


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